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Bonding with Baby: An Interview with Dad

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  • Bonding with Baby: An Interview with Dad
October 20, 2021 Infant

When a baby is born, the two most important people in their life are their parents. But sometimes dad can feel left out in the early stages of baby’s life. Mom has developed a bond with baby starting in the womb and already feels an attachment to her little one. How can dad feel the same connection? Many dads will make a special effort to create that bond with their new precious gift. One such dad is Javier Sanchez. In the interview below, Javier shares how he bonded with his newborn son.

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Live Well:
How did you feel being a dad to a newborn?

Javier: Allie’s mom Ashley loves coming to WIC, especially in the summer. “I come into WIC the first day I can to get the Farmers Market checks. I love to get strawberries with my checks. This year I took my girl with me to pick berries at the farm.” In many states, Farmer’s Market benefits are an added WIC bonus that families use during the summer months. It’s a great way to get your kids interested in fruits and vegetables when they can go to the market or the farms to pick their own food.

Live Well:
What advice do you have for moms to help their partners feel more comfortable with their newborn?

Javier: Work on that bond from the very beginning. Mom should let dad spend as much time as possible with baby, even as a newborn. During that time dad can learn how to care for and interact with baby, and most of all learn to change those interesting little diapers.

Live Well:
How did you bond with your baby the first week? What about later?

Javier: Bonding with my newborn was amazing. Holding him during the first week changed my life. I forgot about work and other frustrations. Over the next few months we moved on to tummy time on the floor, using small toys, rattles and anything that would catch his attention. I was so proud when he flipped on his back for the first time. Every small milestone felt like a great accomplishment. Even changing his diapers felt like some sort of experiment that could only be solved by trial and error.

Live Well:
Did bonding with your baby get easier over time?

Javier: Yes. By six months he could sit and crawl; that’s when the real fun started and our bonding got much easier! Any toy that rolled or made noise was his toy of choice.

Bonding with Baby: Tips for Dads

Dad can bond with baby by getting more involved in the daily routine to give support to new mom and baby:

  • Help with nighttime feedings: bring baby to mom to nurse.
  • Go for a stroll with baby: help mom get some rest.
  • Play: make baby laugh with funny faces or put music on and have a baby dance party.
  • Soothe baby when crying: sing to baby, hold baby close, and rock the baby to calm them. Hold baby skin-to-skin for special bonding time that is great for baby’s health.
New moms can support dad by giving him confidence and helping only when he really needs it. Trust that he will do his best and don’t run to his aid for little things. If you let dad tackle this in the beginning, he will feel more confident and at ease with his new baby. blue leg

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    Side-Lying Hold

    1. For the right breast, lie on your right side with your baby facing you.
    2. Pull your baby close. Your baby’s mouth should be level with your nipple.
    3. In this position, you can cradle your baby’s back with your left arm and support yourself with your right arm and/or pillows.
    4. Keep loose clothing and bedding away from your baby.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • You had a C-section
    • You want to rest while baby feeds
    • You are breastfeeding in the middle of the night
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
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    Cross-Cradle Hold

    1. For the right breast, use your left arm to hold your baby’s head at your right breast and baby’s body toward your left side. A pillow across your lap can help support your left arm.
    2. Gently place your left hand behind your baby’s ears and neck, with your thumb and index finger behind each ear and your palm between baby’s shoulder blades. Turn your baby’s body toward yours so your tummies are touching.
    3. Hold your breast as if you are squeezing a sandwich. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Instead, bring your baby to you.
    4. As your baby’s mouth opens, push gently with your left palm on baby’s head to help them latch on. Make sure you keep your fingers out of the way.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • Your baby is premature
    • Your baby has a weak suck
    • Your baby needs help to stay latched
    • Your baby needs extra head support
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
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    Clutch or “Football” Hold

    1. For the right breast, hold your baby level, facing up, at your right side.
    2. Put your baby’s head near your right nipple and support their back and legs under your right arm.
    3. Hold the base of your baby’s head with your right palm. A pillow underneath your right arm can help support your baby’s weight.
    4. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Bring baby to you instead.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • You had a C-section
    • You have large breasts
    • You have flat or inverted nipples
    • You have a strong milk let-down
    • You are breastfeeding twins
    • Your baby likes to feed in an upright position
    • Your baby has reflux
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
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    Cradle Hold

    1. For the right breast, cradle your baby with your right arm. Your baby will be on their left side across your lap, facing you at nipple level.
    2. Your baby’s head will rest on your right forearm with your baby’s back along your inner arm and palm.
    3. Turn your baby’s tummy toward your tummy. Your left hand is free to support your breast, if needed. Pillows can help support your arm and elbow.
    4. To protect your back, avoid leaning down to your baby. Instead, bring your baby to you.
    5. Reverse for the left breast.

    This hold is useful when:

    • Your baby needs help latching on
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position
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    Laid-Back Hold

    1. Lean back on a pillow with your baby’s tummy touching yours and their head at breast level. Some moms find that sitting up nearly straight works well. Others prefer to lean back and lie almost flat.
    2. You can place your baby’s cheek near your breast, or you may want to use one hand to hold your breast near your baby. It’s up to you and what you think feels best.
    3. Your baby will naturally find your nipple, latch, and begin to suckle.

    This hold is useful when:

    • Your baby is placed on your chest right after birth
    • You have a strong milk let-down
    • You have large breasts
    • You and your baby are comfortable in this position